A bit of introspection never hurt anybody

I've been feeling somewhat disconnected with the blogging world recently. I think it has a lot to do with me trying to find my place here (and by here, I mean where I'm living at the moment) After the breakup I was feeling a bit lost. Lost in terms of where I am and where I'm going.

And then it hit me. For the last few years there has been this subtle (and at times, not so subtle) message as to what I need to do with my life. I've been ignoring it because it scares me, but after this last upheaval, it's staring me right in the face and I can't look away.

I need to go somewhere completely new and I need to do it on my own. Once I'm there I need to make a life for myself. The happiest I ever remember being was when I was on my own with no one to rely on but myself and with no one to worry about but me. I've been running away from that sort of life ever since because apparently I have it in my head that I'd be happier being with someone. That has not turned out to be the case.

So I've decided to apply to zoos all over the country. Wherever I'm accepted, I'm going to go.

As for the semester I still have left in school, I'm going to make the most of it, and the most of being here. In the spirit of that, I've started a knitting group. A stitch and bitch of my very own. It started with some word of mouth to see who'd be interested and the response was somewhat overwhelming. Our first meeting was on Tuesday and I ended up teaching two people to knit (my plans to spread knitting love are going along swimmingly) There was a total of four of us there. More plan on being there next week!

I don't know why I never started one before now. I suppose all my thoughts were wrapped up in a relationship I thought was going somewhere and I didn't want to get too attatched to this place knowing I'd be leaving. I don't know what made me think that because I still plan on leaving but why not make my time here at the very least bearable and maybe even fun? And perhaps leave something behind that other people can enjoy?

Anyway, enough with the deep thoughts. If you've stayed with me through all this reading, I commend you. And you get a little reward. I finished one of the socks I'm making for my grandmother.I can't even begin to tell you how much I love this sock and how perfectly it fits.... me. I'm hoping my grandmom's feet are similar enough to mine that they'll fit. There's still some room to give so I think it'll be fine. And I have to admit I totally covet this sock and want to keep it, but I can't. It was made for Grandma, it's going to Grandma!